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First date sex – what’s the protocol these days?

Published 15/04/2014

First date sex – do you or don’t you, that is the question. The old rule book would have you believe that this is an absolute no no for women. If you’re really into the guy you should wait until date three at the very least, otherwise he won’t respect you in the morning and you’ll never hear from him again. And then you’ll end up as an old maid with a reputation for being the town bike. Right?

Well, I’m going to go out on a limb here and say, wrong. I would like to suggest an alternative line of thought here. How about we tell the rule book to go fuck itself and start making decisions for ourselves based on what we actually want and how we actually feel.

When it comes down to it, if a relationship has potential it makes absolutely no difference whether you get your kit off on date one or date five. If the chemistry is right, and you actually have something in common with each other as opposed to just wanting to fuck each other’s brains out, both parties will quickly get beyond the ‘rules’ stage and just follow their instincts. If it feels right and you both really want to then why the hell shouldn’t you sleep together on the first date? For most people it’s a perfectly natural progression from drinks, chat and an all-round good time. What better way to top off the evening than with a serious session beneath the sheets. If the sex is amazing and you’ve really enjoyed each other’s company then whether or not you see each other again is a bit of a no-brainer. On the other hand if the sex is a bit shit and you’re totally incompatible physically then you won’t be wasting precious time on date number two. And as I mentioned in a previous blog, time is the one thing we modern folk just don’t have enough of.

On the other hand, there is also something to be said for putting sex on hold for another couple of dates. Let the anticipation build up, let the sexual tension crackle and just enjoying having a good old flirt. This is all part of the fun of getting to know each other and having something to look forward to on a Friday night certainly helps get you through the mid-week hump at work.

Whatever you decide to do, let it be your decision, based solely on what you want and not what you think you should be doing. Take charge of your sex life and your sexual decisions, own those decisions and there’s not a guy on the planet who will think anything other than – ‘there’s a woman who knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to go for it.’ Right guys? 😉

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